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You are here: Home --> Forum Home --> Creativity Forum --> Personal Creations --> Random Writings.
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    Messages in Random Writings.
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Karma: 4/1
17 Posts

Random Writings.

Ehh I wrote a lot of poetry during a rough time in my life, thats niether here nor there. Girl problems and being in a desert for the short story. Either way, Im terribly nervous about letting anyone see what I write so why not make you guys stare at it? Critique it por favor!

The fake smiles worked for a while
The look on your eyes, you couldn’t see through my guile
I was a little bit confused I felt a little bit used
Maybe you noticed now, all the blood on the tile.
Good god, its been a while.

You told me it didn’t matter, it was my life
But when mine became yours, yours became ours
I knew how you had to deal with this strife,
You cried for hours upon hours
Looking at this life you hated to call ours, always answering to higher powers
This love grew up like flowers,
Too bad all around my friends grow flowers.

I shoulda known you would find out sometime,
Take a look again, im not so sublime
A life of crime, a sentence of too much time
I shoulda known this s*** would have come back on you
In some senses you are as much a soldier as I am
And for that I can never atone
And having said that I think itd be better if u just left me alone

Yeah it hurts to say that,
And yeah it hurts to think it,
But trust me its gonna hurt when you finally have to see what it really is
People trying to be me,
The only way to be me is to no longer have a me.
The pied piper is calling, and its time I left,
Time I walked away.

Pull me back in if you care,
Theres times I gasp for air
Theres time I realize that its no longer fair,
Why should you care?
To see this heart bare, to see this skin tear,
That’s all there’s left,
And now I think its time I left.
Don’t worry, u do what you do with a so hand deft.
Peace, its over…..
Exit, stage left.

Posted on 2010-08-04 at 16:45:29.

Eol Fefalas
Keeper of the Kazari
RDI Staff
Karma: 454/28
7869 Posts

Good stuff...

...also read some of your other creative writings that you've posted since you joined us and am equally impressed.

Looking forward to reading more, of course...

Posted on 2010-08-04 at 17:05:39.

Ody Fan
Karma: 54/39
1117 Posts

Always happy to find another writer

Keep up the good work, yeah?

Posted on 2010-08-04 at 17:10:47.

Karma: 4/1
17 Posts

Something else...

It’s a funny sight, looking at this world through a mist,
Time is running by me,
Everyone is flying around, yet here I sit,
Laughing in my face is the specter if all the chances I missed.

When failure becomes a product of society,
And if society is the product of the mind,
Then when we look deep inside what else can we expect to find?
None of us are blind, we just chose not to look,
When things get to scarey, its fine to just turn away, look down.

How can people ever expect to change everything around them,
When the thing that really needs to be changed is inside of them?
Too afraid to look forward, it hurts to much to look back,
And it seems the courage to look inside is what we all lack.

Passed chances running past me like street signs,
Im trying to slam on the brakes,
But all that happens is another part of me breaks.
Youll never know how sorry I am, its not that I wont tell you,
I apologized for that night, when all I could do was send you all the wrong signs.
Its come with a warning behind that pretty smile, a hint of danger behind these eyes.
For once to you, these wont be lies.

Im sorry for those times, you worked so hard,
Im sorry for the times you tried to open me up.
With the deft hands of a surgeon you met me at my finest,
Im sorry for those times, I cant apologize for my blindess.

When the world needs to change,
Im sorry it was me that couldn’t change for you.
When the signs were blurring past me, ghosts of a past that should have been me,
Im sorry you were sitting right beside me.

© Brian Dickey

Posted on 2010-08-05 at 00:22:22.

Veteran Visitor
Karma: 7/1
150 Posts


I especially like your poems because I can relate to them in my own sort of way.

I suffer from minor depression that comes on me once in a while and your poems describe how that sometimes feels.

Thank you and good work.

Posted on 2010-08-05 at 00:37:54.

Veteran Visitor
Karma: 7/2
132 Posts

i like them....

Posted on 2010-08-05 at 00:45:11.

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