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You are here: Home --> Forum Home --> Creativity Forum --> Personal Creations --> 1st Poem
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lifespring
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Karma: 33/3
385 Posts


1st Poem

The door seems to close
Feelings lost in transition
Love through stuck in the middle
Want to return its too late
Watch turns moments away
A second of reckoning
Memories left of the building
Does time heal all wounds?

Stars overhead sparkle in talk
World spins is it over
Will it all make sense
A soul seems stronger
Vampirism taken hold
Wishing closed signs turn open
Wanting to push in
Being held out in the dark

Lost now
Head down
Eyes shut
Smiling finally
Time heals
Cherishing remains
Learning well
Feeling Complete

(My grammar sucks, I generally just write from the heart, disregarding proper structure and composition.) hope for feedback!


Posted on 2010-08-21 at 09:02:19.

Eol Fefalas
Turning Capashanese
RDI Staff
Karma: 447/28
7281 Posts


Interesting...

...had to read it a couple of different times, actually, because, depending on how it's read, it evokes different images, thoughts, and feelings.

I like the "free-writing"/"spoken word" feel of it but, for the reasons above, not sure I really understand it.

Very intriguing, though, and I look forward to you sharing more of your work... +1


Posted on 2010-08-21 at 16:33:32.

   
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